The
NFL regular season is mercifully reaching Week 17, and I personally can't wait to see how the playoffs predictably unfold. In contrast, the playoffs of the UMassBallers league were anything but predictable as the Chicago Ferrets surged with wins in 8 of their last 9 weeks to eke into the playoffs and emerge as the 2016 champion!
I think we all imagined Ryan doing exactly this when he clinched the title.
The Ferrets bring to mind other unlikely champions: 2015-2016 Leicester City, Buster Douglas, the 1969 Mets. But perhaps the best comparison is the 2007 New York Giants: the champion that just ruined the fun for everyone! My personal belief is that this is a case of first-time father's luck and that Kai was responsible for the good fortune.
The Ferrets weren't the only interesting storyline from the fantasy season though. Take a gander at my hindsight analysis of the draft, recap of game-changing transactions, and other odds-and-ends in TDZ's annual UMassBallers season synopsis!
It's been a few years, but TDZ is back to talk about fantasy basketball and has put together its exclusive 2016-2017 All-Kevin Love Team!
Oh wow. Huh. I totally forgot this was a thing.
What variables qualifies a player to be on the AKL Team? To be concise, chronic under-utilization which, if corrected for, would yield huge fantasy dividends. That is, a player who would stuff the stat sheet if he got more minutes. Selections must average fewer than 20 minutes per game, and obviously we want to skew towards younger players who haven't been discovered yet, not veterans who are just having their minutes monitored.
Past alums of this illustrious brotherhood include Ryan Anderson, Jeremy Lin (kind of), Ian Mahinmi, Enes Kanter, Ersan Ilyasova, and Lou Williams. Which of these under-the-radar guys will explode onto the NBA fantasy landscape in the coming years?
I think it's safe to say that the RFO earned a playoff berth this year with a 9-4 record (1 forfeit due to lack of team submission).
OK, maybe not - most of the time I was just beating Car RamRod, who has got to be close to the all-time worst team in league history rivaling "The Haha" (real team name: The Brouhaha).
To advance in the playoffs, I've got to outscore one of the actual playoff teams, so if I advance even one round, that would be an incredible feat. Here are my picks - this will either be my worst team of the year, or the most brilliant picks of all-time:
QB: Carson Balmer - There is a balm in Miami to make the RFO whole.
WR: Chris Shogun - Gronk and Amendola injured, so I like his odds for targets.
RB: Flex Burkhead - Has a regular role and up against Browns; due for TD.
TE: C.J. Breed-or-a-mix - The only guy Osweiler can get the ball to consistently.
W/T: Andrew Walk-ins - Deep sleeper; Griffin tends to like taking shots downfield.
W/R: Freddie Fart-ino - Never heard of this guy, but he's stepping up due to injuries in a great match-up with the Saints.
W/R: Cat Asiata - Hoping for that classic 1 yard TD against the Jags.
K: Kai Forbath - Great match-up with Jags, and a great name for Ryan's son.
DEF: Indianapolis Jolts - Dialing up Indy in back-to-back weeks as they look underrated of late. Osweiler stinks.
Another week, another W, looks like the RFO is cruising to a playoff berth! Which is great because Doge Flutie is stumbling the last few weeks and probably not gonna do much in the playoffs. But...
QB: Alex Whiff - He always disappoints when I pick him, but I like QB's when they play in domes.
WR: Kenny Thrills - With Devante Parker on the shelf, I'm actually pretty excited to start this guy.
RB: Pain Washington - Just gimme a non-Ebron goal-line TD.
TE: Ladarius Spleen - Time to finally not drop a TD.
W/T: Marquise Hoodwinked - So few Bills receivers, but also so few pass attempts.
W/R: Chris Slogan - Due for a TD, and without Gronk I'm expecting more spread offense.
W/R: Denard Blobinson - It's garbage time for the Jags as usual, which is Denard's time to shine!
K: Phil Awesome - Niners offense hasn't been AS bad.
DEF: Indianapolis Dolts - Just asking for one more of those 6 INT games from Fitzy.
QB: Ryan Blandfill - Blandfill: when your mashed potatoes don't have flavor and sit like a rock in your stomach.
WR: Adam Congealin' - When that gravy starts getting a skin on it.
RB: Benny Cunning-ham - Not a fan of this 'ham or actual ham on Turkey Day. Tryptophan only, please.
TE: Will Pie - Can't stop picking Pie for the RFO.
W/T: Marqise Pea - Don't forget space on your plate for a veggie.
W/R: Eli Pudgers - We are all Pudgers after the feast.
W/R: Davante Add Yams - Usually has a plump number of targets.
K: Andrew Thanks - Let us have gratitude that no one actually has to trot out this team.
DEF: Tennessee "Belt" Tightens - Don't be shy to let your gut out and watch Fat Barkley and the depleted Bears scuffle on Sunday.
I know it's football season, but I have to share a couple amusing soccer .gif's I came across this week. How are these goalies so unaware of their surroundings and what the other team is up to.
Ugh, is the football season over yet? I'm about ready to hit the snooze bar - wake me up when the playoffs are here.
QB: Joe Whacko - Dallas secondary is dealing with injuries; let's see if Joe is elite or not.
WR: Jeremy Squirrelly - '9ers will likely be in catch-up mode all afternoon, making Squirrelly a garbage time special.
RB: Chris Stomp-some - Game flow will likely give him more snaps this week.
TE: Dennis Knitta - He'll knit together a masterpiece game if he doesn't get injured first.
W/T: Will Try - He's supplanted Barely Donnell and has nice target totals in his last 2 games.
W/R: Kendall Sprite - I like a receiver in a high yield offense, and Titans are on fire against middling Colts D.
W/R: Tyler Sprocket - No receiving TDs this year? He's due.
K: Sebastian Man-and-cow-ski - Man and cow skiing, future 2018 Olympic sport.
DEF: Pittsburgh Squealers - Against the Browns? Talk about a lay-up.
Well, the election happened this week. I'm not going to get into any kind of political discussion. All I'll say is that this was my favorite campaign poster:
QB: Jay Butler - Expecting a shoot-out with the Bucs.
WR: Ted Chin, Jr. - KC DB's have been torched by speedsters before, and not as good on the road.
RB: Kenneth Fixin' - Gradually getting a larger share of snaps, trying to get back to preseason form.
TE: Jesse Shames - Due for a TD, otherwise SHAME!
W/T: Virgil Keen - Due for his first TD of the year, otherwise SHAME!
W/R: C.J. Procheese - Expect a lot of passing fromages (formations), which is all gouda for Procheese.
W/R: Dorial Mean-Heckle'em - He's been trolling the RFO for weeks, but ATL DB's struggle against larger receivers.
K: Slick Slovak - Everyone's favorite Bratislava booter is back in the RFO.
DEF: Chicago Dares - Three straight top-10 performances with lots of sacks; Winston's a turnover factory.
Oh what a week for Chicago sports fans! After 108 years, the Chicago Cubs are MLB champions at last!
I was in the Windy City for work and got to partake in all the thrills of Game 7 and even got to see the parade before flying out. Enjoy some this vid and some pics I took along the way.
I took a video of the parade, but the file size is huge, and I was in the second floor of a candy store that was playing really weird music, so the audio is hilariously bad.
QB: Ballin' Kaepernick - Just hoping he runs against the Aints because his throws look like whiffle balls floating interminably to no destination in particular.
WR: Molding State - 31 targets in his last 3 games.
RB: Jerick McWinnin - Vikings run game has been bad all year... they're due.
TE: Chance Kendricks - Panthers pass D is non-existent, even the Rams might capitalize.
W/T: Black Boil - This Colts TE been a surprising value here and there.
W/R: Marqise Knee - Bortles: so many throws, so little to show for it.
W/R: Dorial Spleen-Wreck'em - Big guy only has 1 TD, c'mon now.
K: Andrew Shanks - Hasn't hit double-digits yet... he's due.
DEF: Dallas Wowboys - Defenses love playing those Browns.
The only thing I want to share with you as we head into Halloween weekend is this SNL sketch. Its inanity is matched only by the existence of this blog.
Any questions????? Here are my Halloween-themed picks for the week:
QB: Alex Sith - Colts D is always rubbish; dome makes for perfect playing conditions.
WR: Jermaine Hearse - Due for a TD in a cake match-up with the Saints.
RB: Ka'Deem Scary - Minnesota D is crazy good, meaning lots of 3rd and longs requiring their passing back.
TE: Charles Slay - Almost no healthy receivers for Bills; targets have to go somewhere.
W/T: Antonio Bates (Motel) - Similar situation to Mr. Slay.
W/R: Russell Leper - Had a breakout game last week, more of the same this week?
W/R: J.J. Hellson - Non-Fitz Cardinals receivers are injured or struggling, time for a step up.
K: Chandler Satanzaro - Time to make up for the shoddy performance against Seattle.
DEF: Detroit Flyin' Monkeys - Osweiler & Co. have no mojo right now.
Another week, another victory for the RFO, bringing my record to 4-2. Sometimes all it takes is a can-do attitude and a touch of ingenuity to make things happen.
QB: Colin Slap-or-flick - Decent floor if he runs and has contract motivation now.
WR: Breshad Merryman - Smith Sr. is out, Aiken is ailing, let the targets pile up.
RB: Strike Davis - Surprised no one picked him up as a bye week fill-in.
TE: C.J. Theodore-witch - Brock can't do much aside from checking down.
W/T: Jack Toil - Dwayne Allen is out, leaving this guy to be their red zone target.
W/R: Derriere Garcon - Detroit secondary is a sieve.
W/R: Shaun Spawn - Just in case Strike doesn't pan out.
K: Ryan Suck up - Indy defense likes to give up points.
DEF: Poo York Giants - Hoping they rise to the occasion against the Lambs in London.
The 6th season of the Nephews of Jody Reed season was perhaps the all-time best with lots of active GMs, competitive matchups every week, and up-and-down crazy storylines that shaped the actual year in baseball. In the end, one team emerged victorious: the VATECH NATS!
Old-time Nat "Da Meat Hook" reppin' that Virginia Tech cap.
The VATECH NATS were run by a rookie GM, but he built a team like a veteran and made some key acquisitions throughout the year to surge down the stretch and win it all. What's next for the VATECH NATS? Well, what goes up must come down... or will it?
As far as the actual MLB season, there were countless stories, from new rookie sensations, injuries, suspensions, new stars, and the end of numerous careers, including Prince Fielder, Mark Teixeira, Alex Rodriguez (maybe), and David Ortiz. Will the end of the Billy Goat's Curse be next?
As always, TDZ's got your season-ending synopsis for all things 2016 NoJR.
Welp, I had a legit loss last week, pushing my record to 3-2 on the season. If I'm making excuses - and I will - it's that things have been way too busy at work. How am I supposed to spend my customary 2 hours per day pouring through free agents when I've got actual work to do?
It's me, except I wish I was this comfy.
QB: Marcus Karaoke - Had a monster Week 5 and should keep rolling.
WR: Philip Corset - The Law of Doge says that my dropped players will have huge weeks.
RB: Bobby Zany - Seems to have a steady role with Vereen out.
TE: Lance Hendrix - Lions among league's worst against TEs.
W/T: Robert Shoulds - Averaging 8 targets/game with Watkins out.
W/R: Breshad Berry Flan - With Smith Sr. out, it's time for this oft-injured rapscallion to do something right for once.
W/R: Torrey Pines - With Kaep back, will the 49ers have a discernible pass attack?
K: Cairo Shank Dos - He's projected for over 11 points? That's the most I can remember seeing for a kicker.
DEF: Kansas City Beefs - Andy Reid is usually pretty good coming out of a bye week.
Hi all, I just want to wish everyone a happy Indigenous Peoples' Day weekend. While many will have a random day off to celebrate Christopher Columbus, let's not forget that he was a prick who enslaved natives and governed his colony through torture and mutilation. The King and Queen of Spain actually had him replaced and eventually imprisoned after an investigation.
This is his jerk face.
Several states have actually begun celebrating Indigenous Peoples' Day, and while it seems like WAY too little too late, it's still better than celebrating a scumbag.
Wow, I did not expect to have a cause-related post for the RFO this week. So, on an unrelated note, you have to check out my link below about Jared Cook's recent chicken wing experience. I'm literally going to inspect every chicken wing I eat from now on.
QB: Philip Shivers - Oakland looks like a decent team, but their secondary doesn't scare me.
WR: Golden Gate - Terrible start to the year, but might get more targets with Ebron out.
RB: Jalen Richard - All it takes is one good series and he might get most of the carries on the day.
TE: Richard Dodgers - Jared Cook is out due to severe and ongoing retching after his experience at a Buffalo Wild Wings.
W/T: Will Dye - Donnell is out so should see a decent number of targets.
W/R: Thrice Butler - Had a lot of targets with Dez out.
W/R: Orleans Snarkwa - Somehow my boi Rashad is still injured, creating an opportunity for Snore-leans.
K: Brandon McGonagall - He's due for a 50-yarder at Mile High.
DEF: Baltimore Cravens - There are 3 things you can count on in life: death, taxes, and the Redskins to make you laugh.
Welllllp, I forgot to write an article last week, so I'm gonna call that a forfeit, meaning the RFO is 2-1. It's too bad, mangenius had a pretty lackluster showing that I could have capitalized on.
Here's the gang for this week, read 'em and weep:
QB: Alex Spliff - Pittsburgh should put pressure on KC to generate offense and throw the ball more.
WR: Pierre Cargone - Browns D is silly.
RB: James Spite - I expect Bills to force Pats to throw; Pats will adjust with White and make Rex and Rob Ryan look like idiots as per usual.
TE: Zach Chiller - Likely a high-scoring affair with Detroit; 9 targets last week.
W/T: Marqise Flea - Should be a shootout at Wembley.
W/R: Whammie Coates - With Eli Rogers hurt and Markus Wheaton benched last game, this guy's a no-brainer.
W/R: Brandon LaSmell - Miami's secondary is like carved up blue cheese.
K: Brandon McMansion - Should be quite a few FG opportunities against Bucs.
DEF: Houston Mexicans - Even without J.J. Squat they're a good play against Titans.
Alright, I've been busy, so apologies for the Twitter-length blog posts to start the year. I joined a flag football league for the fall and am heading out to a free spin class (my first and probably only).
If you're looking for a morsel of content, check out this incredible catch in the OSU-OU game last night:
QB: Matt Ryan - Raiders "D" gave up tons of yards and TDs to Drew Brees
WR: Cole Beasley - Seems to commit a drop whenever I watch him on TV, but the targets are right
RB: Chris Thompson - Change of pace back for Skins has confidence of coaches
TE: Jacob Tamme - Raiders "D" gave up tons of yards and TDs to Drew Brees; Sanu injured
W/T: Kyle Rudolph - Sam Bradford is the worst, but he seemed to "target" Rudolph a number of times, if that's what you can say about any of his passes
W/R: Jeremy Kerley - Someone's got to catch passes from Gabbert when the 49ers are in catch-up mode.
W/R: Jamison Crowder - Is it clear at this point that I'm chasing targets?
K: Brandon McManus - Colts defense is points-friendly.
DEF: Green Bay Packers - Because Sam Bradford is the worst.
Another month is coming to a close, and we now have a clear front-runner in NoJR with Gmonie16 surging to an impressive .719 win percentage and 13.5 game lead in the division. His team has depth across stat categories and doesn't seem to be slowing down any time soon, especially with...
Kaboom.
Jackie Bradley Jr. on the squad. He has played the past month at an elite level and has really continued growing after a strong finish to last season, much to the delight of me and Red Sox Nation. As of May 30, his month includes 18 runs, 7 HR, 26 RBI, 2 SB, 17 BB, and a .406 BA. Let's not forget that 29-game hit streak either.
When my Reavers faced off against Gmonie16, Bradley supplied a preposterous 6 runs, 15 RBI and .469 BA. Somehow I still won RBI, but lost the other two categories by razor thin margins to finish the week with a 5-6 L. JBJ!
Another surprise performer of the past month is a blast from the past: C.C. Sabathia. He went a modest 2-0, but with 21 K in 20 IP and 0.45 ERA and 0.75 WHIP.
C.C. currently ranks 24th all-time in Ks, and will likely finish the year in 22nd place. I haven't heard a lot of buzz about him as a candidate for the Hall, but if he keeps pitching for a couple more years (he'll be 36 at the end of the year), he could be in elite company statistically (250 wins and around 3,000 Ks).
Clayton Kershaw also had a pretty good month - 49.2 IP, 5 W, 65 K, 0.91 ERA, 0.52 WHIP.
From the very old to the very young, let's talk Julio Urias. He made his MLB debut on May 27 at 19 years old, and many were hoping to see a glimpse of the special pitcher that he projects to be. As happens so often, however, the youngster had some trouble in the spotlight and couldn't locate his pitches.
That being said, he's going to be great. He projects as a #1 starter as few have dominated the minors like he has, and none at such a young age. The one knock on him is his height (5'11"), but it only makes Pedro Martinez an even more fitting comp in this FanGraphs article.
Expect more call-ups as the calendar turns to June. Some prospects I expect to see in the bigs shortly:
Tyler Glasnow - Front of the rotation stuff, has 2.25 ERA and 2.44 FIP with 11.09 K/9 in AAA.
Jameson Taillon - I like how he projects based on an elite K/BB ratio (54/5); currently has 1.79 ERA and 1.94 FIP in AAA.
Trea Turner - Danny Espinosa is coasting at the Mendoza Line, while Turner is raking: .319/.385/.481 plus 16 SB.
Orlando Arcia - If only Jonathan Villar could start playing bad, Arcia's path would be secure. Hitting .293/.326/.414 with 8 SB.
J.P. Crawford - good patience at plate and was recently promoted to AAA, only a matter of time.
Walk off grand slam!
Khris Davis led all players this month in home runs (11), and his teammate Danny Valencia is starting to look like a power hitter (7).
Adam Duvall has basically turned into what GMs hoped they were getting from Jay Bruce.
We focus a lot on the offensive side of the ball in fantasy, but if you want a good read on Kiermaier's unbelievable 2015 "Platinum Glove" defense, read this.
As far as the league standings, the Cubs are still tops in the league. The Yankees were able to scrape their way up to .500, while the Royals managed to take back 1st place in the AL Central. The NL West will be a battle all year between the Dodgers and Giants, but the Giants have a solid 4.5 game lead right now.
Yesterday, a 43 year old pitcher hit his first round tripper, a feel-good historic moment that set off the home run trot of a lifetime. Soak it in, baseball fans - you will probably not witness anything like this ever again.
Colon was already having a good year on the mound, but this is quite the cherry on top. If he can cap this year off with a World Series, it will be one of the greatest conclusions to a baseball career possible.
Now if only Jamie Moyer could come back and hit his first career home run, that would completely blow my mind. It seems like he quietly left baseball only yesterday, but he's now 53 years old!
We're merely one month into the season, and already there have been quite a few interesting events shaping 2016. Here's a quick look around the horn:
In terms of free agent acquisitions, Aledmys Diaz has perhaps been the "best of the rest" and may prove to be the best pickup this year (congrats, 'Toga). In an analysis by Fangraphs reviewing the 19-game debuts of players over the past decade, Diaz has had the best, even outpacing Yasiel Puig's in 2013. Oh yeah, and he's got middle infield eligibility.
On the downside, his BABIP is sky high and will eventually drop, but if he can keep his K-rate where it is (only 8.2%), he might have a decent shot to finish the year with a BA above .300. That's if Major League pitchers don't find a major weakness in his game.
Nolan Arenado is a beast. The only knock I had on him entering this year was that he had a relatively low walk rate for a slugger, but he's nearly double it this year (9.2% vs. 5.1%). Oh yeah, and he has more home runs than strikeouts. Costing AJ's Aces just $2, I currently have him as the most valuable keeper in the league.
I couldn't rightly talk about April without mentioning Arenado's teammate, Trevor Story. The batting average is receding as expected, but we'll see if the power lasts long-term (10 HR so far).
Does anyone else remember the cautionary tale of Chris Shelton? He hit 10 homers in April of 2006 only to end up with 16 in total for the year.
I like to make up my own sound effects when the ball hits the bat.
Who would have thought that a little 171 lb. squirt like Dee Gordon would be the first major fantasy star to get caught for PEDs this year? A tough break for Grand Theft Votto, but Trea Turner is currently hitting well with plenty of steals and should slot in nicely later this year.
Jake Arrieta is still doing what he does best, namely picking up W's and having an ERA around 1.00. Former Orioles pitching coach Rick Adair will never again work in MLB for stifling his awesomeness.
Kenta Maeda-mania gripped Los Angeles for the first month as the Japanese export made an impressive transition to MLB. It's amazing what throwing strikes can do, and he's got pretty good "stuff" to go with that accuracy. If only I had bid on him some more!
Give it up, I'm hitting too!
Noah Syndergaard's average fastball velocity is 98 mph according to Fangraphs. Average. As in a lot of his pitches actually go faster than that. I wonder how he'd compare to Aroldis Chapman coming out of the bullpen; it's hard to believe the human arm can throw that hard over so many innings as a starter.
David Ortiz is off to a great start for his final season, hitting 5 home runs and slashing .306/.404/.612. I believe he will pass Ted Williams (521 home runs) and finish just shy of Jimmie Foxx on the all-time homers list, which would make him 19th on the list.
As a Sox fan, I know I'm biased, but I really believe that, even being a DH, he deserves to enter the Hall. He was a major factor in 3 World Series championships, and I'm old enough to remember "the Curse" and what a big deal it was to end that drought. Others might point to PED accusations, but he's been by the book - at the very least - since MLB changed their PED policy and has continued to perform at a high level even in his late 30's. He's simply one of the all-time great hitters.
Regardless of the Hall, Ortiz is in Boston's pantheon.
Apologies in advance to any Cubs fans out there in case I jinx them, but they clearly look like the early favorite to win it all. They have the best record in baseball and by far the best run differential (+89; the next closest is St. Louis with 40).
Things are looking pretty good on the South Side too, where the White Sox own the best record in the AL.
The biggest underachievers? The Yankees and Astros, both postseason teams last year, are languishing in the bottom of the AL, but there's plenty of time to right the ship.
Last Thursday, 11 men and 1 very price-conscious A.I. went mining for draft day values. So much hope, so much potential, so much... hey I thought draft day gold would be different than this...
While it was tough to find under the radar values in this draft, there were still quite a few nifty picks, and perhaps some overzealous spending. As is tradition, I've selected some of the top "Gold Grabs" and "Pyrite Picks" for each team.
The weather is finally warming, retirees and ballplayers are migrating back north for the winter, and sabermetricians are dusting off their calculators. It can only mean one thing - the Nephews of Jody Reed are back in action!
Go Isotopes!
Welcome to the 6th year of NoJR. We've got a great group of active GMs once again, and I'm looking forward to a fun year of baseball.
In the following blog
post, I'll give you some of the background on the league in FAQ format. Disclaimer: most of this is a cut-and-paste job from a couple years ago, but I'm busy these days, so please forgive me.
In 2011, Daniel Bard was well on his way to becoming one of the elite relievers in MLB. The previous season was a breakout campaign where he posted a 1.93 ERA, 1.00 WHIP, and averaged a K per inning. His average fastball velocity was a sizzling 97.9 mph. 2011 was quite similar, and he even set a new Red Sox record for consecutive appearances without giving up a run (25). At just 26 years of age, he had an incredibly bright future ahead of him.
Better days...
That same year, however, things began to unravel. In September, he posted a 10.64 ERA, and he walked more people that month (9) than in the previous three months combined (8). On September 4th, the Red Sox were 9 games ahead of the Rays for the AL Wild Card, but then squandered that lead and missed the playoffs. Based on the metric WPA (win probability added), Bard was most responsible for the Red Sox's collapse at the end of that year. Somehow, things were going to get even worse...
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