Friday, December 27, 2013

Puttin' on the Blitz - The 2013 UMassBallers Season Revue



We're 16 weeks into the 2013 NFL season, which can mean only one thing: another UMassBallers season is in the books. For 11 players, it's a time to reflect on the mishaps and misfortunate of a fantasy season gone awry, while 1 UMass alum gets to bask in virtual football glory. Now who's that GM?

Nick Norman. His name's Nick Norman!!
Nickel Blitz claims a well-earned championship this year, leading the league in points scored, and ending a two-year reign of flatulence by Farts are Funny. Click below for a full season synopsis, including the best bargains and busts from the draft.

Thursday, October 31, 2013

Boston Red Sox: 2013 World Series Champions!

For the 3rd time in 10 years, the Boston Red Sox have reached the summit!


I can't help but feel spoiled rotten - this is not the kind of thing that happens too often, and going from worst to first is particularly rare (only other team to do so was the 1991 Minnesota Twins in a World Series that secured my life-long love for baseball).

Ranking this season among my favorites, I have to put this team as the second favorite within my lifetime as a fan. I don't think any team will be able to usurp the 2004 Red Sox, but this team featured a uniquely likable and memorable group of guys. From vintage Big Papi to my favorite dirt dog, Dustin Pedroia, to the krucial kontributions of Koji Uehara, and the clutch performances of all their bearded brethren, this is a team I'll never forget. And while I fear "Boston Strong" is borderline overplayed, this season is extra special for me based on how the team responded and gave the fans their all, on and off the field following the Boston Marathon bombing.

Top ten favorite seasons as a Red Sox fan (1989-2013):
  1. 2004
  2. 2013
  3. 2003
  4. 2007
  5. 1999
  6. 1995
  7. 2008
  8. 1990
  9. 2005
  10. 2000 (all Pedro)

Sunday, October 20, 2013

Red Sox Win ALCS

Another clutch grand slam helps power the Red Sox to the World Series.


Wednesday, October 9, 2013

The Kase for Koji

Acolytes, I've been doing some thinking lately, and it's about something I've been reading in the news. You've probably been reading about it, too. Now I'm not one to get get involved in politics, but in this particular case I cannot keep silent. I'm of course talking about the heated debate among Cy Young voters regarding the candidacy of relievers.

Starters have been, and always will be, the preferred choices among Cy Young voters. Once in a while, though, a reliever is so utterly dominant that he demands attention for the most coveted pitching award in the game. This is one of those times.

Domo arigato for the awesome season, dude.
Koji Uehara, originally tabbed as the setup guy to Joel Hanrahan and Andrew Bailey, stepped in to the closer's role with the Red Sox and put together one of the best seasons by a reliever in MLB history. Unfortunately, preference for starters and the ever so sexy/meaningless save stat may doom his chances.

Fear not! TDZ is here to make an ironclad case for why Koji must be the 2013 AL Cy Young winner.

Monday, October 7, 2013

Reavin' Ain't Easy - The Nephews of Jody Reed 2013 Season Revue

If the 2013 Nephews of Jody Reed season taught us anything, it was to expect the unexpected. A variety of new players took their place among the fantasy elite, such as Chris Davis and Jose Fernandez. Puig-mania became a thing. The Royals and Pirates finished with winning records in the same season for the first time since before I hit puberty. The Biogenesis PED scandal altered the course of the season, from both a real and fantasy perspective, in an unprecedented way. And in the end, the eventual NoJR league champion wasn't even a top-6 team at the All-Star break.

The 2013 Rip City Reavers: from scrap heap to marauding terror.
These crazy events underlie just a few of the storylines from this latest edition of NoJR. Let's take a look back in this special TDZ season revue, from the draft day duds and studs to the fresh crop of free agent finds and all the way to the finale.

Wednesday, August 28, 2013

TDZ's Fantasy Football Draft Primer 2K13

Are you in an abusive fantasy football relationship? Do you draft the same players, year after year, fully aware that they'll cause you pain? Has your mind become so twisted over the years that you want that pain - that familiar, comfortable, numbing pain - and without it you feel lost in a sea of draft madness?

Hi there, TDZ here. My goal for this year is to help you beat this addictive cycle. You deserve better than beating yourself with the Chris Johnsons, DeSean Jacksons and Ryan Mathewsesess of the world. 

When you just drafted Darren McFadden's corpse again.
Open your heart and mind to new possibilities, and take a risk on someone new. Just look at all the eligible candidates below who are willing to join your team without abusing your auction budget.

This is TDZ's Fantasy Football Draft Primer 2K13.

Sunday, August 18, 2013

Ryan Dempster

Just when I thought he couldn't get any dumber, he goes and does something like this...


... and TOTALLY REDEEMS HIMSELF!

Thursday, April 11, 2013

Going on Hiatus

Attention acolytes,

TDZ will be going on hiatus for the next couple of months. For the most part, I can say "been there, done that" when it comes to flawless yet whimsical sports coverage, so I'm turning my attention to writing fiction with a creative writing class, starting this Saturday. Should I produce anything that's half worth reading, I will post snippets here for your feedback.

Thanks for your understanding and support throughout many months of TDZ lulz and inanity.

Sincerely,

-D

Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Thrice Crowned - Weekly Trivia!

Prior to Miguel Cabrera, many know that Carl Yastrzemski was the last player to hit for a triple crown in 1967. The year before Yaz, though, Frank Robinson achieved the same feat, and he's this week's trivia answer.

Yes, he won the triple crown, and he's got the goofy photo to prove it.
Acolytes, there's nothing more American than going to a restaurant and getting food in under 2 minutes. Waiting any longer than that would be uncivilized. Fortunately, we're blessed with a plethora of quick serve options. My question for you is...

Which of the following quick-serve restaurants is not ranked in the top 10 for most locations in the United States?

  • Burger King
  • KFC
  • Taco Bell
  • Dairy Queen
  • Starbucks
Good luck, and enjoy the start of baseball season!

Monday, March 25, 2013

Florida Gulf Coast University EAGLES

The FGCU Eagles have soared into the Sweet 16, the first #15 seed to ever do so, and America can't get enough of their high-flying, slamma jamma style of play. If you haven't seen them yet, take a look at this dunk compilation on Deadspin. Wow.


Go Eagles!

EDIT: Evidently their students live in dorms overlooking a beach. That ought to make recruiting easy.

Sunday, March 10, 2013

Mighty Mouse Rocks the House - Weekly Trivia!

I had to do a double-take when I looked at the list of NBA Dunk Contest winners, but 5'9" Nate Robinson has actually won the most in NBA history (3). I had to go back and check out Youtube to remember any of the ones he did though. 2006 looks like his best work (below), while the other championships were pretty mediocre. Vince Carter definitely had the most memorable win for me.


Baseball is coming up fast with spring training in full swing! Last year was one for the history books, including Miguel Cabrera becoming MLB's first Triple Crown winner since 1967.

Which one of these players also won a Triple Crown?
  • Hank Aaron
  • Joe DiMaggio
  • Hank Greenberg
  • Mel Ott
  • Frank Robinson

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

"Game of Thrones" Sports Logos

"If I wanted to know what happened in Europe a long time ago, I'd watch Game of Thrones."
- Troy Barnes, Community

Back in the old days, before sports, straight-up sudden death combat was basically the world's favorite physical past-time. It only makes sense that wars (or "games") between opposing lands (or "teams") translate rather well to the competition in sports. And of course you've got your dynasties: the Persians, the Greeks, the record-setting Romans; and of course you've got your expansion franchises with imperialism. Some of those franchises turned out better (USA) than others (Canada).

With the numerous battle lines drawn in Game of Thrones, it makes perfect sense that each of the kingdoms should get the sports logo treatment! Check 'em out.


Saturday, February 16, 2013

Futbol Americano - Weekly Trivia!

In what I thought was a tough question about recent historical events, both of my respondents emerged triumphant with the correct answer: the NFL hosted its first regular season game outside of the U.S. in Mexico City before the release of the first iPhone in 2007 (2005). Congrats to you both.

Wooo! You know it's a big event if Bumble Bee Man is in the house!!
This is All-Star weekend for the NBA, which means one thing to me: Dunk Contest time!

Which of the following players has won the most NBA Slam Dunk Contests?

  • Vince Carter
  • Dominique Wilkins
  • Nate Robinson
  • Spud Webb
  • Dwight Howard
Good luck.

Monday, February 11, 2013

TDZ's All-Kevin Love Team 2K13

It's that time of year again, when TDZ takes you on a journey into parallel universes, where much-deserving bench players get added minutes and make the jump to top fantasy contributors.

If Star Trek taught us anything, our alter egos in parallel dimensions have facial hair. You think it's a coincidence Ryan Anderson grew his the year he broke out? Mind blown - you're welcome.
There's a nebula off the starboard bow, and sensors are detecting temporal distortions. Let's approach at half impulse and get a closer look at the future fantasy basketball studs-to-be.

Tuesday, February 5, 2013

Pixar Animator Fan Art

Greetings, Acolytes.

I came across this cool set of NFL-inspired fan art made by an animator at Pixar. Look through them once, and then do it again - I was surprised to find that I actually missed some cool details my first time through. Maybe I'm just sleepy though.

Here's a sample (and my favorite):


And here's the link to the rest of them. Enjoy!

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

This Is How We 'Duz It, 'Duz It - Weekly Trivia!

It was another geography crowd-displeaser this week, this time involving European capitals. We did have one winner! The country in the list that doesn't have a capital beginning with "L" is Liechtenstein (capital: Vaduz). Congrats to the brilliant mind with too much free time.

The red arrow indicates "this place exists."
Evidently a new Blackberry came out sans keypad recently, just under 6 years after Apple released their first iPhone. In today's business world, that's practically an eternity, but somehow Research in Motion hasn't quite faded into obsolescence. You know what has? Planking, thankfully.

Which of the following things did NOT happen in the last 6 years (2007-2013)?
  • The NFL plays its first ever regular season game outside of the United States (Mexico City).
  • The Mitchell Report is released, implicating 89 MLB players in the use of PEDs.
  • The Republic of Kosovo becomes an independent state.
  • SpaceX launches the first ever private spacecraft.
  • Bernard Madoff is arrested and charged with securities fraud.
This one's a bit of a toughie, I bet - good luck!

Thursday, January 24, 2013

New Orleans Pelicans Logo Battle Royale

In an ironically unironic move, New Orleans's NBA team has settled on a new name for the future: the New Orleans Pelicans. Possessing all the intimidation of a bunny and none of the mythology of a stork, this new mascot will quickly become a fan non-favorite for years to come.


The fun doesn't stop there, though. With the new name comes a new logo! And there was a contest held by a Canadian design website to create the crest for this new team name which has torn up the internet world among only the smallest niche of logo-philes. Click below to see some of the efforts, as well as the winner.

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Before Oh-Four - Red Sox Fun Fact

I learned something new today about the Red Sox which makes their 86 year World Series drought even more heart-rending. In every World Series that the Red Sox reached between 1918 and 2004 ('46, '67, '75, '86), the Red Sox took the opponent to a full seven games and lost in the final game.

There was color TV back in 1986. The world just turned grey for these few seconds.
So close, yet so far, every time. And that really sums up the Red Sox fan experience: the team makes us dare to dream, and then dashes those hopes in the most heartbreaking way possible. To quote Prof. Todd Crosset. "Sports can't help but disappoint." I'm glad I lived to see 2004.

Monday, January 21, 2013

Better Than Nothin' - Fantasy Hockey 2K13

Oh, you didn't think I'd miss out on a season of fantasy hockey just because it's a shortened year, did you? The puck dropped on January 19, and you better believe that TDZ is going to be one Serious Cat to contend with in his rando auction league.

Serious Cat = hax
Click below for a breakdown of all the Mike Ricci-hot bargains and Patrik Stefan-hilarious busts in this truncated fantasy season.

Sunday, January 6, 2013

I'm Not Dead Yet! - The NHL Lockout Comes to a Close, Probably

With the 2012-2013 season on the line, the players and owners came together and finally reached a tentative agreement on a Collective Bargaining Agreement.


The result? It looks like a win for the players, though both sides got some things they wanted. Here's how it all shook out:
  • Cap of $64.3 million (up from $60 million originally proposed by league, down from $67 million proposed by players)
  • Salary floor of $44 million (a mere $8.3 million in 2011-2012)
  • Limits on contract lengths
    • 8 years if re-signing, 7 years if signing a free agent that switches teams
  • Salary variance maxed at 35% from one year to the next, as well as no year being more than 50% lower than the highest annual salary in the deal
    • E.g. anyone with a salary of $10 million for one year within the contract can't have a salary lower than $5 million for another year in that contract.
    • This should help avoid wildly long deals that circumvented the cap, but it's still a pretty good deal for the players. The NHL was asking for 5% variance at one point.
  • Revenue sharing of $200 million, with a $60 million "growth fund." Not sure exactly what that is yet.
  • Neutral third party will make decisions on appeals for suspensions of 6 games or more.
Now with a little luck, the puck will drop in a few weeks, but part of me is still hoping this framework for a deal breaks down and we see the rise of the WHA.

Thursday, January 3, 2013

Dreamin' of a White Christmas - Weekly Trivia!

Christmas has come and gone, but a TDZ trivia win is for eternity. One person guessed the correct answer this week, which was Fargo. This movie did not have a scene depicting Christmas, though it was set in a scenic winter backdrop with lots of white snow. Let your trivia mastery be heard in the comments - unless it was my Dad, who took like 3 guesses to get the right answer offline.

Don't mistake any red in the snow with candy cane color coordination.
This week, I challenge you with the first TDZ trivia question of 2013, and to celebrate I'm going to go back to the world of geography.

Which of the following countries does NOT have a capital starting with the letter L?
  • The United Kingdom
  • Portugal
  • Slovenia
  • Luxembourg
  • Liechtenstein
 Have a good weekend, Acolytes.

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

WHA, Part Deux - Postbecoming the Greatness It Never Wasn't

As a sports fan and former sports academic (technically speaking), there's nothing that intrigues me more than the possibility of an upstart rival league challenging the monopoly of the incumbent. With the money involved in today's sports industry, it's hard to imagine conditions being just right to create an opportunity with a reasonable chance of success. The existing league would have to be poorly run, have an even poorer relationship with its labor force, regularly test the loyalty of the fans, and if it wasn't even operating, that would be even better. I figured I'd never see such an opportunity within my lifetime. How could any league let things get so bad?


But this is exactly what we're seeing with today's NHL. Now on its second lockout in 8 years, the question we should be asking isn't whether there should be a rival league. The question is, why isn't there a rival league?