Friday, April 22, 2011

The NBA Playoffs - aka "Why we need robots now more than ever."

The NBA playoffs are underway, and everyone's real excited. After a great regular season, shocking trade deadline, and stellar individual performances, it's time to play the real games. The games that count. Not those T-Wolves vs. Clippers blooper reels (though they were much more fun with Love and Griffin this year) - I'm talking about quality, smash-mouth, defensive, team basketball. The way James Naismith intended.

And yet, part of me is reluctant to watch any of it. The game has become as annoying to watch now as it must have been to play back in Naismith's day when no one had the foresight to cut a hole in the freaking fruit basket. I've rarely watched a game where I wasn't vexed by the refereeing. And it's not just the refs being awful, corrupt, Tim Donaghy, yada yada yada... it's also annoying to have the game stopped over and over and over, especially down the stretch.

Well, originally the charter for this blog mentioned something about innovative ideas, and while most of it has been snarky commentary about athletes interspersed with odd pop culture references, I'd like to think TDZ can still amount to something more than a sleazy sports rag.

So, without further ado, some ideas to make basketball less annoying to watch than soccer again.


Friday, April 15, 2011

Early Season Accounting

Between work and marathons of 3rd Rock from the Sun on Netflix, I just couldn't find time to review the world of sports. With playoffs starting for hockey and basketball, and baseball officially in full swing, it's time to drop the bag of generic brand Doritos and start thinking about the exciting months ahead.

Starting with baseball, it's time for fantasy owners to account for their draft day profits and losses. There's no off-shore tax shelter in Dominica that can save you from disclosing the horrendous mismanagement of your team! Now it's time to bring in the Bobs for some "human resource realignment," aka Danger's gonna take a hacksaw to your team.

What do you say... ya DO here?
Introducing: a new bi-weekly/whenever-I-want segment of "Mashers, Belly-scratchers, Pitchers, and Belly-itchers," plus some waiver-wire fodder after the jump.