2015 Roster Freak Out - Week 7

After several debates, the election race for 2016 is well underway here in the U.S., but did you know that the Canadian elections have already come and gone for this year? Yep, their campaign season lasted a grueling 78 days. It's not 600 days like in the U.S., but it's pretty good for Canada.

Despite the shortened campaigning window, Canada actually rivals the U.S. in terms of having suspect politicians running for office. From candidates who visit Auschwitz and still don't know the significance of the site to candidates who are appliance repairmen and pee in coffee mugs at clients' homes.

In a shameful act of lazy journalism, I'll let John Oliver breakdown the Canadian election season.

"Oh, Canada!"? More like "Oh, Canada...." You so silly.

The result ended up being a win for the Liberal party and Justin Trudeau, who really knows how to throw himself down a flight of stairs to get the ladies.  It also means a loss for conservative leader and Islamophobe-in-chief Stephen Harper.

After all the election hullaballoo, I think I can speak for all Canadians when I say it's time to kick back, relax, crack open a Molson, eat some pepperoni, and watch some hockey. And of course, enjoy the most cherished Canadian past-time of all: reminiscing about the greatest CFL player of all time: Doge Flutie.


The RFO is just 2-4 and in dire need of a win to salvage the season.

We talked about our northern neighbors already, so for border equity I'm going down south to Mexico for this week. Enjoy these loose translations of player names into Spanish. ¡Ándale!

QB: Nico Potros - I like Foles and the Ramz at home.
WR: Roberto Bosque - Woods has got the goods with Harvin and Watkins doubtful.
RB: Diestro McGrupo - Expecting Titans to play from behind and use McCluster in pass game.
TE: Jared Cocinero - Doubling down on Ramz pass game, ay caramba.
W/T: Jaime-hijo Apiñaro - Solid number of targets each week, DeSean expected to sit again.
W/R: Conquistador Campana - Evidently "Joique" means "conqueror" in French - hopefully he's conquered being injured all the time.
W/R: Tyler Medallón - Got a feeling he gets a return TD and a couple nice grabs.
K: Mar Forbath - I had to translate his first name from Hawaiian and then into Spanish. Btw, his Wiki entry says under "Early years": Forbath was born in Santa Monica, California, with an unusually large head. He struggled with bullying as a kid. Poor guy. :(
DEF: Nova Inglaterra Patriotas - Pats are due for a defensive TD, and Fitzmagic wants to give it to them.


RESULTS:
QB: Nico Potros - 6.32 points
WR: Roberto Bosque - 14.4 points
RB: Diestro McGrupo - 6.8 points
TE: Jared Cocinero - -0.1 points
W/T: Jaime-hijo Apiñaro - 4.8 points
W/R: Conquistador Campana - 3.5 points
W/R: Tyler Medallón - 13.9 points
K: Mar Forbath - 2 points
DEF: Nova Inglaterra Patriotas - 4 points
TOTAL: 54.62 points

Not gonna cut it - what a dreadful season.