2017 Roster Freak Out - Week 5

QB: Jabroni Brissett - Seems to love playing at home; maybe he can stir up a dumb QB controversy with Luck returning soon.
WR: Donte Mond-grief - Doubling down on Dolts this week. That's a bold move, Cotton, let's see how it works out for him.
RB: Elijah McFlyer - His ypc looks real good.
TE: Boston Pastafarian-Jenkins - McCown loves throwing to TEs.
W/T: Benjamin Squatson - Raiders secondary isn't "Patriots bad," but they're bad.
W/R: GERONIMOOOOO - This time it's for real.
W/R: JuJy Fruit-Poopster - More celebrations from this guy plz.
K: Aldrick Noses - Due for a bigger game.
DEF: Oakland Nadirs - I think they'll finally get an INT against Flacco.

2017 Roster Freak Out - Week 4

Alright, this year of football was really not interesting me at all - until last weekend when there were so many games decided in the final seconds.

Oh how sweet it is!

So I'm back and picking the best of the worst for another week. Time to dig out from this 1-2 hole.

2017 Roster Freak Out - Week 2

Had a busy weekend and didn't have time to write an article, meaning it's an all-MNF RFO! WOOOO!

2017 Roster Freak Out - Week 1

"Fantasy football is a nightmare at the intersection of man's hubris and the horrors of a reality over which he exerts no control...

- Werner Herzog"

- Darren Bishop

Evidence that Herzog is a Bears fan.

Under the pall of this disturbing omen... we embark on another season of UMassBallers!

Speaking of nightmares, imagine you didn't show up for the fantasy draft, and auto-draft wasn't even working, leaving you with a completely empty roster to start the year. Who are you gonna pick up to play each week?

That's the premise of my weekly Roster Freak Out series, which is back once again for 2017. If my team of misfits outscores any of the UMassBallers, I score that as a W. If not, it's a L.

We'll have to find out whether a 10-team league improves or worsens the RFO. Without further ado, here are the selections for Week 1...

NoJR 2017 - Mid-season Round-up

Nephews, we are officially at the halfway point of the season, and what a season it's been. Sure, some things haven't been surprising at all, but then you see things like the Brewers in 1st place, Mike Trout on the DL, and Aaron Judge vying for a Triple Crown and just shake your head with a smirk.

Gaze upon young blood Jody Reed.

So while I've been busy with work and somewhat derelict in my duties as league scribe, I wanted to take a look at the fantasy year so far, including the biggest studs, duds, and NoJR mid-year power rankings.

Nephews of Jody Reed - Season VII Roll-Out

Do you feel it? The weather's getting warmer. The sun is up longer. Bartolo Colon has emerged from his hibernation slumber. It's time for baseball. It's time for... the Nephews of Jody Reed!

It's called packing on the pounds for winter, guys. He just had a head start.

Welcome one and all to the 7th year of NoJR. It looks like we've got a great group of active GMs returning, and we're adding a couple new friends to the fold, so 2017 is shaping up to be a fun year of baseball.

Below are some FAQs about the league that I copypasta'd from prior seasons - take a look if you want the 4-1-1 on all things NoJR.

Comeback in the Cards with the Cards for Bard?

A year ago, TDZ chronicled the rise and fall of former elite Red Sox reliever Daniel Bard, who endured an incredibly rough time trying to get back into the Bigs after he lost command of his pitches. He was all but counted out.

Daniel Bard's new delivery with 96 mph gas as he preps for spring training in Cardinals system https://t.co/yIw5dvkwor #Cardinals pic.twitter.com/Qq0j1DGVfZ

— Gammons Daily (@GammonsDaily) February 24, 2017

Despite the many setbacks to his career, Bard has reemerged in the news and is getting a shot with the St. Louis Cardinals. A recent Yahoo! Sports article offers some glimpses of hope for Bard, who is showing the same hallmark velocity that made him so dangerous early in his career. If he doesn't regain his command, though, then we'll see some of the wildness that made him so "dangerous" late in his career.

While the video only shows a sample size of 3, it looks like he's releasing the ball from a lower arm slot with intriguing side-to-side movement. Hopefully this is a step in the right direction and he makes a good impression in Spring Training to earn a spot with the Cards.